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Social security started earlier than Roosevelt and 1932. It goes back to men who wore suspenders — that was their security.

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Some people are so picky about how they want their steaks cooked. Why, recently, this guy even got down to what type blood it should have — Type A.

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My doctor asked for a specimen and the nurse showed me the room. She stood by the door, and after 10 minutes, I opened it and announced, “I am having some real problems, as I can't get the lid off of this small jar.”

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Christmas is coming. A lot of people exchange gifts (money). The big worry is what size, as all dollar bills are the same size: 6 inches long and 21 inches wide.

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I came home late from watching a high school football game, and my wife, June, got historical. That's right, as she started digging up my past.

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Some people live within their income, and others live within their credit rating. Be careful about this.

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At my age, I was part of the usual thing for the 1950s. My wife, June, worked hard at her job, but those were the years when new wives worked "from here to maternity."

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Military problem — what would you call a man who went into battle without a gun? Quick answer: a general.

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The school bus driver observed that a boy came on his bus, but later left the bus with no banana. He admonished the boy to go back to his bus seat and get the banana peel.  The boy said that would not be necessary, as he put the banana peel into the backseat pocket of the boy next to him; sanitation solved.

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Our U.S. national colors are red, white and blue. We get red talking about them, white when we finally figure out how much we owe and blue after we pay them. The only thing left are the stars that occur when we talk about them.

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